Living authentically sounds like an overused phrase. It’s preaching to the choir so to speak. But at the same time, have you taken the time to think about it?

Two of my classes spent a day at the beginning of the semester talking about authenticity in others and yourself. I’ve taken a lot of time to reflect on what that means to me and how I see it play out in my life. By thinking and writing out my thoughts, here’s where I’ve landed:

It’s hard to find authentic friends in college; especially your freshmen year. That year, you’re constantly meeting new people whether it’s professors, classmates, roommates, your RA, other Greek life members, or clubs. At times you’ll meet people and think you’re about to make lifelong friends, and other times… well you’ll think the exact opposite. Some of these people are going to be so (super) inauthentic that it’s unbelievable.

We should probably give inauthenticity a little explanation. It’s like when you’re having a conversation with someone and they’re staring at their phone not truly listening. It could be talking to a professor who says they care about their student’s success, yet they rush you out of their office in the middle of drop-in hours. There are a million and one ways a person can be inauthentic, but at the end of the day, I think of it as someone who’s not being their true and authentic self, not showing empathy, or actively wanting to know you as a person. It’s not realistic to say everyone must be their authentic self 100% of the time around every single person they come across (note: that’s an introvert’s nightmare).

So how do you be authentic? 

The big thing (at least to me) is being true and accepting of myself. Yes, I can actively work to make changes in my life, BUT I can also accept my flaws and my core beliefs without changing them for the sake of others. Every person has flaws of all sorts; it’s the human in us. Your core beliefs make us individuals and who we are. 

Another big part of authenticity is the different levels of openness around friends. The more you are around a person the more comfortable you become and can show more sides of your personality. For example, I’m very comfortable and open with my roommates because I’m around them so often and consider them my close friends. They see some of my most authentic selves as we walk through the highs and lows of our last year of college together. 

Alright. Boring explanations over. Living authentically… It’s living freely in your skin and being who you are. The second part of the sentence, “being who you are” is something I’m still learning to do. 

I’ve changed and grown a lot over my college years. It’s taken me a long time to have the confidence I do now (even if it doesn’t always show). For me, it’s showing up in my friend’s lives and vice versa. It’s embracing my interests both new and old. It’s living for myself and not others.

So, while the phrase live authentic might sound blah, I can’t encourage you enough to reflect on what that means to you. 

ps. Lucky lives authentically by grabbing your hard for attention <3!

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